英语幽默教程汇总和更新

One day after school the teacher said to his students, Tomorrow morning, if any one of you can answer my first question, I will permit him or her to go home earlier. 一天，放学以后，老师对他的学生们说：明天上午，如果你 [查看全文]

Will and Bill were quarrelling about whose father was the stronger. 维尔和比尔在争吵，谁的爸爸是更强壮的一个。 Will said, Well, you know the Pacific Ocean ? My father's the one who dug the hole for it. 维尔说：你知道 [查看全文]

An absent-minded person was standing in the middle of a busy intersection where a policeman was directing traffic, and he kept bugging the policeman because he was confused. 有个很健忘的人站在车水马龙的十字路口正中央，那 [查看全文]

Girl:When we get married,I want to share all your worries,troubles and lighten your burden. 女孩：我们结婚后，我会分担你的忧虑和烦恼，减轻你的负担。 Boy:It's very kind of you,darling.But I don't have any worries [查看全文]

A blonde went into a pizza parlor. When she said that she'd like a medium pizza, the clerk asked her how many pieces she'd like to have it cut into: six or twelve. 一位金发女郎走进一家比萨店，她说想要一个中比萨，店员 [查看全文]

When I take a long time, I am slow. 我做事情花了长时间，是效率低； When my boss takes a long time, he is thorough. 老板做事情花了长时间，是深思熟虑。 When I don't do it, I am lazy. 我没有做完事情，是懒 [查看全文]

Mother: Mary, why do you yell and scream so much? Play quietly like Eddie. See, he doesn't make a sound. 妈妈：玛丽，你为什么这样大喊大叫的？ 为什么不能像艾迪那样安安静静的玩儿呢？你看艾迪一声儿都不 [查看全文]

A guy is reading his paper when his wife walks up behind him and smacks him on the back of the head with a frying pan. 一个人正在看报纸，他的妻子走到他身后，用一只煎锅敲他的后脑勺。 He asks, What was that for? [查看全文]

On her return from school, little Dolly, aged ten, was pulled on to her Daddy's knee, and informed that the fairies had that day brought a big surprise a little baby brother. She see med glad, and presently said: 放学回到家里，十岁的 [查看全文]

-- Waiter, this lobster has only one claw. -- 服务员，这个龙虾只有一只爪。 -- I'm sorry, sir. It must have been in a fight. -- 对不起，先生，这只肯定打过架了。 -- Well, bring me the winner then. -- 哦， 那给我 [查看全文]