如何停止对生活的烦恼?
如何停止对生活的烦恼?
Do you get easily annoyed? At times, does that emotion quickly escalate to anger? You are not alone.
你容易生气吗?有时，这种情绪会迅速升级为愤怒吗?你并不孤单。
You shouldn't live with it, though.
但你不应该忍受它。
Beyond improvements to your general mood and happiness, taming your anger can have important benefits to your health. Constant stress and aggravation is linked to a range of issuesincluding overeating, insomnia and depression, and angry outbursts increase the risk of heart attacks and strokes.
除了改善你的总体情绪和幸福感，控制你的愤怒对你的健康也有重要的好处。持续的压力和恶化与一系列问题有关，包括暴饮暴食、失眠和抑郁，以及愤怒的爆发会增加心脏病发作和中风的风险。
Despite how common it is for us humans to become annoyed and angry -- from road rage to air rage and work frustrations to parenting -- there are few easy solutions. Maybe we've just accepted outsize irritation as a part of life, or maybe simple answers are antithetical to a problem that can be ingrained.
尽管我们人类变得恼怒和愤怒是多么的普遍-从道路上的愤怒到空中的愤怒，从工作上的挫折到养育子女-但几乎没有简单的解决办法。也许我们已经接受了过度的愤怒是生活的一部分，或者简单的答案与根深蒂固的问题是对立的。
Easily getting bent out of shape, even angry, is my problem, too. It was happening more than I wanted and was cumulatively stressing me out, which is why, a couple of years ago, I set a goal to come up with an easy system, based on sound psychology, that I could employ in moments of annoyance.
我的问题还包括容易发脾气，甚至生气。这样的事情发生得比我想要的要多，而且不断地给我带来压力，这就是为什么，几年前，我设定了一个目标，要建立一个简单的系统，基于健全的心理学，我可以在烦恼的时候使用它。
Below are simple steps I use to give perspective to, and gain distance from, unbridled irritation and anger. Employing them has significantly reduced the number of instances in which I get irritated, or at least has shortened their duration.
下面是简单的步骤，我用它们来透视和远离肆无忌惮的愤怒和愤怒。使用它们大大减少了我生气的次数，或者至少缩短了我生气的时间。
Step one: 10 breaths
第一步:10次呼吸
At the first moment you realize you are experiencing annoyance or anger, just breathe. Ten slow, deep, even breaths do wonders. Sometimes, the annoyance will have passed in just that time.
当你第一次意识到你正在经历烦恼或愤怒时，深呼吸。十次缓慢、深沉、均匀的呼吸能创造奇迹。有时候，烦恼就在那个时候过去了。
Even if it hasn't, the breaths still help. Diaphragmatic or abdominal (as opposed to shallow) breaths, in which you breathe from deeper inside your belly and fill your lungs, deliver more oxygen to your body, which stabilizes blood pressure and helps invoke your body's relaxation response.
即使没有，呼吸仍然有帮助。横膈膜呼吸或腹式呼吸(与浅呼吸相反)，你从腹部深处呼吸，填满肺部，向身体输送更多氧气，从而稳定血压，帮助激发身体的放松反应。
It may help to add a mantra ("I have the patience of the Buddha" is one I like to use when the kids' bedtime-delaying tactics are keeping me from relaxing on the couch) or a calming image to hold in your mind. I sometimes accompany my 10 breaths with a memory of a surfer I once watched paddling into the sunset of the Pacific Ocean. He is often capable of pulling my annoyance out to sea with him.
在你的脑海里加上一句咒语(“我有佛陀的耐心”是我喜欢用的一个咒语，当孩子们拖延睡觉时间的策略让我无法在沙发上放松时)或一个平静的画面可能会有所帮助。有时，我伴随着10次呼吸，回忆起我曾经看到的一位冲浪者在太平洋日落中划水的情景。他常常能把我的烦恼带到海里去。
Step two: Explain it to yourself
第二步:向自己解释
If the breaths don't make a dent, try explaining what's happening to yourself. "I'm annoyed right now because ..." is a good sentence to finish. Articulating the issue changes your response from emotion to logic.
如果你的呼吸没有产生任何影响，试着解释你自己发生了什么。“我现在很生气，因为……”是个很好的结束语。阐明问题会使你的反应从情感转变为逻辑。
Step three: Walk a meter in their shoes
第三步:站在他们的立场上
Make use of this step when another person is part of the reason you are upset. Try hard to see the situation from their reality and invent a subjective theory for why they did what they did.
当别人是你不开心的原因之一时，利用这一步。试着从他们的现实中看到情况，并为他们所做的事情创造一个主观的理论。
