他其实没那么喜欢你 第75期:情感上疏远对方

"Oh, if only I had played it better! He would still bemine!"

“噢，如果当初我更高明些就好了!那他现在还是我的。”

Or simply, you're worried that he's dead on thestreet somewhere.

或者，你很担心他会不会在街上或某个地方死掉了。

Why else would he just disappear like that?

要不然他怎么会突然人间蒸发呢?

So then, you want to call him and say something. Orwrite him.

接着，你就想打电话给他说点什么，或者给他写信。

You're either angry or hurt, or still holding out hope that's he's in a coma at a hospitalsomewhere.

你要不就是感到很生气或很受伤，或还残存希望，他现在在某地医院昏迷不醒。

But however you feel, you definitely think it is your right to either yell at him or find out whathappened.

但无论你是什么心情，你坚信你有权利朝他大吼，或是找出真相。

What's worse than not knowing? Nothing. Except maybe not getting to tell him off.

有什么能比一无所知更糟糕呢?没有。也许不能大骂他一顿除外。

Greg would say that the best revenge in this situation is not anger, but emotional distance,as quickly as possible.

格雷格会说，在此情况下，愤怒并不是最好的报复方式，尽快从情感上疏远对方才是。

Greg would say that we have the answer.

格雷格会说，我们知道答案。

He didn't want to stick around, and wasn't man enough to tell us to our face. Isn't that answerenough?

他不想留在我们身边，也没有胆量当面跟我们说清楚。这还不足以说明问题吗?

That's when I would say to Greg, "No, actually it's not. That answer's definitely not goodenough. I want to know why."

就是那时，我会告诉格雷格，“不，真的不够。这个答案一点也不好。我想知道原因。”

And then Greg would say, "Really? Are you sure? Do you really need him to detail every lastreason why he didn't feel like seeing you ever again?"

然后格雷格会说，“真的吗?你确定吗?你真的要他仔仔细细跟你说清楚他不想再见你的全部原因吗?”

I hate Greg.

我恨格雷格。

Breakups are horrible. But to me, what's truly devastating is to feel like you weren't evenworth a breakup.

分手很糟糕。但对我来说，更让我备受打击的是，自己好像连一个正式分手都不值。

Again, it's natural to want to do something about that.

重申一遍，想去做些什么是很正常的。

Greg just wants that "something" to be about moving on, as opposed to looking back.

格雷格希望那个“什么”是指向前看，与回首过去相反。

Not having closure is one of the most difficult things for me (and many people) to live with, so Iknow why it might be impossible not to call the cad.

对我而言，得不到了断是我(和许多人一样)最无法忍受的事情之一，所以我很清楚为什么不给那个混蛋打电话是不可能做到的。

But I guess Greg would lecture you again (he's such a know-it-all) , and say that before youmake that phone call or write that e-mail, you should at least play it out in your head.

但我猜格雷格会再教训你一顿(他自以为无所不知)，告诉你，在你拨那通电话或写那封邮件之前，至少在脑子里先预演一遍。

Will it really make you feel better? Do you think it will really change the way he feels aboutwhat he did, or you?

那真的会让你感觉好些吗?你真的以为那能改变他的看法吗，对自己的所作所为或是对你?

Is it the only thing you can think of that will help you move on?

你只能想到这个办法来让自己向前看吗?

If it is, then I say the hell with Greg—give the guy a call.

若果真如此，我会说，让格雷格见鬼去吧——快给那个男的打电话。

But I guess the hope is (for me, at least) that when a guy no longer wants to communicatewith me, and doesn't have the manners or courage to tell me that to my face, he's given me allthe information I need.

但我猜，当一个家伙再也不想和我交流，也没有基本的礼貌或勇气当面跟我说，他其实已经告诉了我所有信息。

It's the toughest one of all to put into practice.

而将其付诸行动则是世上最难的事。

But I definitely like the kind of girl who could do it. Good luck to us all!

但我一定会喜欢那种能做得到的女孩儿。祝我们好运!