美国女模特霍莉·麦迪逊在休·海夫纳的评判下住在花花公子大厦时患上了“身体畸形”

For Holly Madison, residing in the Playboy Mansion for nearly a decade had lasting effects on her mental health. 

对霍莉·麦迪逊来说，在花花公子大厦居住近十年对她的心理健康产生了持久的影响。

Madison, who was only 21 when she moved into the Holmby Hills home, was Hugh Hefner's girlfriend from 2001 to 2008 — and that title meant conforming to specific and restrictive beauty standards.

麦迪逊搬到霍姆比山的家时才21岁，从2001年到2008年，她是休·海夫纳的女朋友——这个头衔意味着符合特定的、严格的审美标准。

“I would definitely say that living in the mansion created a body dysmorphia for me because I was always kind of wondering what's wrong with me," Madison, now 43, tells PEOPLE exclusively. "[Hugh] had a way of making me feel like I wasn't pretty enough, and I would look around to everybody else and constantly be wondering, what's so different about them and why are they so much better?” 

现年43岁的麦迪逊在接受《人物》杂志独家采访时说:“我可以肯定地说，住在豪宅里让我的身体变得畸形，因为我总是在想我到底怎么了。”“(休)总有办法让我觉得自己不够漂亮，我会看看周围的人，不断地想，他们有什么不同，为什么他们比我好得多?”

According to Johns Hopkins Medicine, body dysmorphic disorder (BDD) is considered a mental health disorder that manifests as “worry about the way your body looks” to the point where “it interferes with your ability to function normally.” 

根据约翰霍普金斯医学院的说法，身体畸形障碍(BDD)被认为是一种精神健康障碍，表现为“担心自己的身体看起来的样子”，以至于“它干扰了你正常运作的能力”。

Undertaking “extreme measures” such as “repeated cosmetic surgical procedures to correct the perceived flaw” is also a hallmark sign, according to JHM.

根据JHM的说法，采取“极端措施”，比如“反复进行整容手术来纠正察觉到的缺陷”，也是一个标志性的迹象。

Understandably, Madison consistently felt “self-conscious" about every aspect of her appearance.  

可以理解的是，麦迪逊一直对自己的外表感到“自我意识”。

“It was constantly like, what can I do? What can I do? What can I change? How can I look better?” recalls Madison, who has been open in the past about having a nose job and a breast augmentation.

“我一直在想，我能做什么?我能做什么?我能改变什么?我怎样才能看起来更好?麦迪逊回忆道，她过去曾公开接受过隆鼻和隆胸手术。

“When I look at what the typical Playboy bunny looks like with the blonde hair and big boobs, I always wanted to look like that. That was just something I would see and it would resonate with me, and it wasn't to impress any certain person,” Madison explains of her decision to have plastic surgery. “I just wanted to look like that, and that's what attracted me to the Playboy brand in the first place.”

“当我看到典型的花花公子女郎金发大胸的样子时，我一直想变成那样。这只是我想看到的东西，它会引起我的共鸣，而不是为了给某个特定的人留下深刻印象，”麦迪逊解释了她做整形手术的决定。“我只是想看起来像那样，这就是花花公子品牌最初吸引我的地方。”

While she chose to undergo plastic surgery "for myself" at first, Madison says living in the mansion with Hefner had a negative impact on her self-confidence.

虽然她最初选择“为自己”做整形手术，但麦迪逊说，与海夫纳住在一起对她的自信心产生了负面影响。

“I could be looking like a plastic surgery nightmare right now!” reflects Madison. “Because it was just constantly me wondering, what's wrong with me? What's wrong with me?” 

“我现在看起来就像整形手术的噩梦!”麦迪逊反思道。“因为我一直在想，我到底怎么了?我怎么了?”