用心养育孩子的三个问题

用心养育孩子的三个问题

Leo Tolstoy's "War and Peace" is one of literature's greatest hits. It also contains more than half a million words. I'll get to it eventually, possibly not before I retire.

列夫·托尔斯泰的《战争与和平》是文学巨著之一。它还包含50多万字。或许我退休之前不会做，但我始终会去做的。

Tolstoy's "The Three Questions" is a parable of an emperor who seeks out a holy man on a mountain for answers he believes will help him be a great ruler. His questions are:

托尔斯泰的《三个问题》是一个寓言，讲的是一位皇帝在山上寻找一位圣人，寻求他认为有助于他成为伟大统治者的答案。他的问题是:

1. What is the right time to begin anything?

什么时候开始合适?

2. Who are the right people to listen to?

谁是合适的听众?

3. What is the most important thing to be doing at any given time?

在任何时候最重要的事情是什么?

The old man is too good a teacher to just tell the emperor the answers. The wisdom needs to be internalized, not given away. So while the ruler patiently waits, he helps the old man dig a garden he's struggling to start.

这位老人是个很好的老师，不能只把答案告诉皇帝。智慧需要内化，而不是给予。因此，在统治者耐心等待的同时，他帮助老人挖了一个他正在努力开垦的花园。

Hours later, they're interrupted by the distressed sounds of a third man who has been stabbed. The emperor and holy man bandage him up, saving his life. It turns out the injured man was planning to assassinate the emperor to avenge his brother's death in war. He had been waiting to attack the emperor as he came back down the mountain. Tired of waiting, the man leaves hiding, only to be ambushed and almost killed by the emperor's guards. That's when the holy man and emperor step in and save him.

几个小时后，他们被第三个被刺伤的人痛苦的声音打断了。皇帝和圣人给他做了包扎，救了他的命。原来那个受伤的人正计划刺杀皇帝，为他哥哥在战争中的死亡报仇。他一直在等着皇帝从山上回来时攻击他。厌倦了等待，这个人躲藏起来，却被皇帝的卫兵伏击，差点被杀。这正是是圣人和皇帝介入并拯救他的时候。

In return, the assassin reconciles with the emperor. The old man's garden is completed. And the emperor gets his three answers.

作为回报，刺客与皇帝和解。老人的花园完工了。皇帝得到了他的三个答案。

"There is only one time that is important -- now!" the wise man explains, "the most necessary person is the one with whom you are," and the most important thing is to "do that person good."

“最重要的时间就是现在!”智者解释说，“最有重要的人是和你在一起的人”，最重要的是“为那个人做好事”。

If the emperor hadn't stayed to help dig the garden and then rescue the assassin, either he or his enemy would be dead.

如果皇帝没有留下来帮助挖掘花园，然后营救刺客，他或者他的敌人都会死。

How does this ancient story apply to parenting?

这个古老的故事是如何应用于育儿的呢?

The time you are with your children is the most important time. And they are the most important people at that time. Paying attention and trying to do them good, which usually just means giving them your full attention, is the most important thing for you to do.

和孩子在一起的时间是最重要的。他们是当时最重要的人。关注并努力为他们好，这通常意味着给予你全部的关注给他们，是你要做的最重要的事情。