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什么时候为自己设定高期望值是好的?

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2020年10月14日

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When Is It Good to Set High Expecations for Yourself?

什么时候为自己设定高期望值是好的?

The setting of expectations is highly personal. Rule No. 1 is to not set them for others over whom you have no control. When people disappoint you, it’s usually because you set unreasonable expectations for them.

期望的设定是非常个人化的。第一条规则是不要为你无法控制的人设置这些规则。当人们让你失望时,通常是因为你给他们设定了不合理的期望。

Magical thinking leads to phenomenally high expectations, but does it work? Studies have shown it gives true believers more self-confidence which, in turn, can improve performance. But if you interpret it strictly—that simply thinking about an outcome causes it—you’ll be sadly mistaken.

神奇的想法会让人产生超乎寻常的高期望,但它真的有效吗?研究表明,它给真正的信徒更多的自信,反过来,可以提高表现。但是如果你严格地去理解它——仅仅是考虑结果——你就大错特错了。

Instead of magic, you should rely on setting high expectations for yourself where attainment would result in a meaningful improvement in your life. Situations that call for high expectations include:

不要依靠奇迹,你应该给自己设定更高的期望,达到这些期望会给你的生活带来有意义的改善。需要寄予厚望的情况包括:

1. Your Job

你的工作

Your job is one area of your life where you want to excel. You want to be better than others at what you do and to be rewarded for it. Striving for upward mobility prevents stagnation in your profession.

你的工作是你生活中可以出类拔萃的一个领域。你想要在你所做的事情上比别人做得更好,并因此得到回报。努力向上可以防止你的职业停滞不前。

While having high expectations for yourself at work can be stressful, it can also make your job more engaging. Taking pride in your work, helping others grow, and delighting your clients are great ways to remind yourself why you do what you do. Providing value makes showing up to work every day fulfilling and worthwhile.

虽然在工作中对自己有很高的期望会给自己带来压力,但它也会让你的工作更有吸引力。以你的工作为荣,帮助别人成长,取悦你的客户,这些都是提醒自己为什么要做这些事情的好方法。提供价值使每天的工作更充实,更有价值。

2. Your Health

你的健康

Nothing in life deserves higher expectations than your health. Without it, everything else in life will feel like a struggle. Setting high standards for your exercise, diet, and nutrition keeps you physically capable. Exercise daily, and make sure every meal includes a fruit and a vegetable.

生活中没有什么比健康更值得期待的了。没有它,生活中的其他一切都将感觉像一场斗争。为你的锻炼、饮食和营养设定高标准,让自己保持体力。每天锻炼,确保每餐都有水果和蔬菜。

Treat your mental health the same way. Making time to meditate is a lot easier if you have high standards for your emotional well-being.

用同样的方式对待你的心理健康。如果你对自己的情绪健康有很高的标准,腾出时间来冥想会容易得多。

Of course, there are some health issues people can’t avoid, like getting certain cancers or autoimmune diseases. But setting high goals for treating or managing them is still important for your quality of life.

当然,有些健康问题是人们无法避免的,比如某些癌症或自身免疫性疾病。但是为治疗或管理它们设定高目标对你的生活质量仍然很重要。

3. Your Treatment of Others

你对待别人的方式

Even if you’re not an avid reader of the Bible, you’ve probably heard of the “Golden Rule”: “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” Respect for others is one area where you should never make compromises.

即使你不是圣经的狂热读者,你也可能听说过“黄金法则”:“己所不欲,勿施于人。”“尊重他人是你永远不应该妥协的一个方面。

Whoever you are, you owe others your time. Phil Stover, a venture capitalist and CEO of gaming community PvP.com, is unusual among VCs in his willingness to help entrepreneurs with things like pitch preparation.[2] While VCs are busy people, Phil knows the importance of treating others well.

不管你是谁,你都欠别人时间。菲尔·斯托弗是一名风险投资家,也是游戏社区PvP.com的首席执行官。在风投界中,他与众不同的地方在于,他愿意帮助创业者做一些事情,比如准备投资项目。虽然风投们都很忙,但菲尔知道善待他人的重要性。

Maintaining high expectations for how you treat others isn’t always easy. After all, there are a lot of people whose actions and words make it tough to respect them. Next time you have to deal with someone who’s being difficult, remember that respect is returned in the proportion it’s given.

对自己如何对待他人抱有高期望并不总是件容易的事。毕竟,有很多人的言行让人很难尊重他们。下次当你要和刁难你的人打交道时,记住尊重的回报是有比例的。

One of the best ways to earn others’ respect is to treat them with respect. Perhaps in the attempt, you will help someone else figure out the importance of holding others in high esteem.

赢得别人尊重的最好方法之一就是尊重别人。也许在这样的尝试中,你会帮助别人认识到尊重他人的重要性。

What if you don’t quite measure up to your expectations for your job, your health, or your treatment of others? You would still have done better than if you had not. That alone is a reason to hold high standards. But sometimes, it’s okay to let them slip.

如果你在工作、健康或对待他人方面没有达到自己的期望怎么办?你还是会做得更好。这本身就是一个保持高标准的理由。但有时候,让它们顺其自然就好。


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