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维持异地恋的8个小贴士

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2020年08月24日

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8 tips for maintaining a long-distance relationship

维持异地恋的8个小贴士

Avoid letting geographical distance become emotional distance can be a challenging task. Sure, the good side of it is that you won’t have to shave your legs or clean your apartment every day, but it will take determination, optimism, and effort to turn a distant relationship into a love story.

避免让地理距离变成情感距离是一项具有挑战性的任务。当然,它好的一面是你不必每天刮腿毛或打扫你的公寓,但它需要决心、乐观和努力把一段遥远的关系变成一个爱情故事。

Nothing is impossible, however, and these tips will help your romance come to fruition, no matter how far away the distance between you are.

然而,没有什么是不可能的,无论你们之间的距离有多远,这些建议将帮助你们保持爱情。

Find the best time to talk

找最好的时间多聊天

While texting and emailing are available 24/7, sometimes you need to talk to your partner and get an immediate response. Depending on the distance, it may take some time to figure out the best time for conversations, but practice makes perfect and having fun voice messages can make up for the disconnected times or wrong times. And it doesn't matter if you can only call each other on Sunday mornings - spending time together is what matters.

虽然短信和邮件是24小时待命的,但有时你需要和你的伴侣谈谈,并得到即时回复。根据距离的不同,可能需要一些时间来确定对话的最佳时间,但熟能生巧,有乐趣的语音信息可以弥补不连接的时间或错误的时间。如果你们只能在周日早上给对方打电话,那也没有关系——重要的是要花时间在一起。

Find the most effective channels to stay in touch

找到最有效的保持联系的渠道

Once you've found the right time, finding the perfect communication channel is also important. Luckily, it's never been easier or cheaper to communicate with the world right now: A Wi-Fi connection is often all you need to talk via Skype, chat and text. Make sure your primary communication tool is easily accessible to both of you, and don't forget that having various channels of communication will make chatting a lot more enjoyable.

一旦你找到了合适的时间,找到完美的沟通渠道也很重要。幸运的是,现在与世界沟通比以往任何时候都更容易、成本更低:通过Skype、聊天和发短信,你只需要一个Wi-Fi连接就可以了。确保你们的主要交流工具对你们双方来说都是很容易获得的,并且不要忘记拥有不同的交流渠道会使聊天变得更加愉快。

Be creative

要有创意

Record a voice message during the night, write a letter, and send your partner a postcard or a gift box or a music disc made by you. Use your imagination and find new and surprising ways to let they know that you are thinking about them. This doesn't mean you have to spend all of your money, though.

在晚上录制语音信息,写一封信,给你的伴侣寄一张明信片、一个礼盒或一张你制作的音乐光盘。发挥你的想象力,用新的、令人惊讶的方式让他们知道你在想他们。但这并不意味着你要花光所有的钱。

Don't run away from arguments

不要逃避争论

When you only see each other every few weeks or months, or when you speak different languages, it's easy to ignore problems or concerns. Nobody wants to spend time quarreling when they only have 48 hours together, but avoiding quarrels and arguments can be harmful in the long run. The more you talk about the problems that get in your way before they become major issues in your relationship, the better. However, do not argue via text or email (as there are too many implications). Try to discuss it in person or on the phone as soon as problems arise.

当你们每隔几周或几个月才见一次面,或者当你们说不同的语言时,很容易忽视问题或担忧。当只有48小时在一起的时候,没有人愿意花时间在吵架上,但是避免争吵和争论从长远来看是有害的。在这些问题成为你们关系中的主要问题之前,你们对它们谈论得越多越好。但是,不要通过文本或电子邮件争论(因为有太多的含意)。一旦出现问题,试着当面或电话讨论。

Speak out

说出来

Always try to be open and honest about your feelings. Not knowing where the other person is right now or who they spend the Saturday night with can unnecessarily make you both overthink and panic. The fact that social media makes it easier for you to see (or imagine) someone is happy, doesn't make things any easier. It is important that you trust each other enough to share your thoughts and feelings and also find ways to deal with jealousy, anger, or distrust of each other.

总是试着开放和诚实地表达你的感受。如果你不知道对方现在在哪里,或者不知道周六晚上和谁一起度过,你就会不必要地过度思考和恐慌。社交媒体让你更容易看到(或想象)某人很快乐,但这并不会让事情变得更容易。重要的是,你们要足够信任对方来分享你们的想法和感受,也要找到处理嫉妒、愤怒或彼此不信任的方法。

Think positively

积极思考

The fact that you will still be essentially living a normal life while maintaining a long-distance relationship can be both a blessing and a curse: You may feel like you're missing things with your partner, as it is difficult to be able to do simple things as a normal couple, like taking each other to work or having lunch together. However, it can also be a big plus as you will be able to do what you want without canceling a dinner plan or making the other worried.

异地恋让你仍然过着正常的生活,这对你来说既是福又是祸。你可能会觉得你和你的伴侣错过了一些事情,因为作为一对正常的夫妇很难做一些简单的事情,比如带对方去工作或一起吃午饭。然而,这也可以是一个很大的好处,因为你可以做你想做的事情而不取消晚餐计划或让对方担心。

Do boring things together

一起做无聊的事情

Since you only see each other a few times a year, it's like a long vacation. There's nothing wrong if you just enjoy it, sleep, eat brunch, and see the scenery, but doing some boring activities is also important - you know, everyday tasks like folding things, running errands, or mowing grass. Try to make monotonous work fun and enjoyable together.

因为你们一年只见几次面,这就像一个长假。如果你只是享受它,睡觉,吃早午餐,看风景,没有什么错,但是做一些无聊的活动也很重要——你知道,像折叠东西,跑腿,或修剪草坪这样的日常工作。试着让单调的工作变得有趣和愉快。

Know when you will meet again

知道什么时候你们会再相见

Depending on how much time and money it takes to meet each other, it could be a whole process for the two of you to meet. Not knowing when you will meet again only messes with your emotions and life plans. So, it's best to choose a date as soon as possible after you get home. This way, you can plan ahead while taking advantage of early booking and special offers, not to mention having something to look forward to! (Of course, surprise visits are also great, so do it once in a while if you can.)

这取决于见面所花费的时间和金钱,见面可能是一个完整的过程。不知道什么时候会再见面,只会搅乱你的情绪和生活计划。所以,最好在你回家后尽快选择约会。这样,你可以提前计划,同时利用提前预订和特别优惠,更不用说有一些期待!(当然,出其不意的拜访也是不错的选择,所以如果可以的话,偶尔尝试一下。)


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