如何教育孩子性别平等

如何教育孩子性别平等

Ask a group of New Jersey fifth- and sixth-graders about the differences between girls and boys, and at first it gets a tad uncomfortable.

问一群新泽西州五年级和六年级的学生关于男孩和女孩之间的差异，一开始会有点不舒服。

"That would be kind of awkward," said Tyler Schlegel, who is in his last year at Lincoln Elementary School in Caldwell, New Jersey.

泰勒·施莱格尔是新泽西州考德威尔市林肯小学的最后一年学生，他说：“那会有点尴尬。”

Once I clarified that I wasn't interested in the physical contrasts but wanted to know whether he and his classmates thought there were other differences between boys and girls, he relaxed quite a bit.

当我澄清我对身体方面的对比不感兴趣，但想知道他和他的同学是否认为男孩和女孩之间还有其他的差异时，他放松了不少。

"Oh, that makes more sense," he said.

“哦，这更有意义，”他说。

I asked gender questions such as: Who is smarter? Who raise their hands more? Who is better at sports: girls or boys?

我问了一些性别问题，比如:谁更聪明?谁举手比较多?谁更擅长运动:男孩还是女孩?

"Boys get in trouble more, but it depends who it is," Tyler said.

“男孩更容易惹上麻烦，但这取决于是谁惹的，”泰勒说。

"Girls, I know, like to wear makeup, a lot of them, and boys don't," said Toniann Garruto, a fifth-grader.

五年级学生托尼安·加鲁托说:“我知道，很多女孩喜欢化妆，而男孩不喜欢。”

"In the classroom, there is definitely more gossip with the girls," said Casey Wescott, who just started middle school.

刚上初中的凯西·威斯科特说:“在教室里，女生之间的流言蜚语肯定更多。”

"Boys are usually stronger or faster; that's what my brother likes to say," added Fiona Laddey, another fifth-grader.

“男孩通常更强壮或更快;我哥哥就喜欢这么说。”另一位五年级学生菲奥娜·拉德伊补充道。

As they answered, you could hear stereotypes already forming, even in elementary school, which was not a surprise to Katie Hurley, a child and adolescent psychotherapist, writer, speaker and author.

当他们回答时，你可以听到已经形成的刻板印象，即使是在小学，这对儿童和青少年心理治疗专家、作家、演说家和作家凯蒂·赫尔利来说并不奇怪。

Children are internalizing the messages they hear from their parents and teachers and what they see on television and in video games, movies and music, she said.

她说，孩子们正在内化他们从父母和老师那里听到的信息，以及他们在电视、电子游戏、电影和音乐中看到的东西。

Stereotypes set in at an early age

在很小的时候就形成了刻板印象

According to a recent report by Common Sense Media, "Watching Gender: How Stereotypes in Movies and on TV Impact Kids' Development," gender stereotypes play a big role in teaching boys and girls what the culture expects of them.

根据常识媒体最近的一份报告《观察性别:电影和电视上的刻板印象如何影响儿童的发展》，性别刻板印象在教育男孩和女孩文化对他们的期望方面发挥了重要作用。

Kids between the ages of 7 and 10 start to attribute certain qualities to women and men, such as that men are aggressive and women are emotional.

7岁到10岁的孩子开始把某些品质归因于男女，比如男人好斗，女人情绪化。

"Sadly, the stereotypes that we see in media are very problematic and as big business continues to market specifically for girls and boys, gender-based norms are only becoming more ingrained," Jayneen Sanders, an author, publisher and advocate for gender equality education at home and in schools, said in an email. "Our girls see little choice other than pink and 'cute' in (the) girl's section and our boys see no other choice than blue or grey in the boy's section," said Sanders, author of several books for children including "No Difference Between Us."

“可悲的是，我们在媒体上看到的刻板印象是非常有问题的，随着大企业继续专为男孩和女孩营销，基于性别的规范只会变得更加根深蒂固，”作家、出版人、家庭和学校性别平等教育的倡导者杰妮恩·桑德斯在电子邮件中说。桑德斯曾著有多本儿童读物，其中包括《我们之间没有区别》。桑德斯说:“我们的女孩在女生专区只能看到粉红色和‘可爱’，而我们的男孩在男生专区只能看到蓝色或灰色。”

This gender stereotyping continues to be reinforced "every hour of every day" online, on television and in games, songs and books. "And because the adults in these children's lives see and perpetuate the same messages, gender stereotyping continues to be reinforced in our homes and classrooms," Sanders said.

这种性别刻板印象在网络、电视、游戏、歌曲和书籍中“每时每刻”都在强化。桑德斯说:“因为在这些孩子的生活中，成年人看到并延续了同样的信息，性别刻板印象在我们的家庭和教室里继续得到强化。”

'Boys will be boys' and 'girls will be girls'

“男孩就是男孩”，“女孩就是女孩”

Parents can help teach their kids about gender equality by never using gender as an excuse for behavior, experts say.

专家表示，父母可以通过不把性别作为行为的借口来帮助教育孩子性别平等。

"Do boys roughhouse? Sure, but so do girls," Hurley said. "I have a son and a daughter, and my daughter is way more a roughhouser than my son."

“男孩打闹吗?当然，但是女孩子也一样。”赫尔利说。“我有一个儿子和一个女儿，我的女儿比我的儿子更粗鲁。”

Sanders said parents and teachers should make sure they are not reinforcing traditional gender roles. Girls can take out the garbage, and boys can do dishes, she said. Let both boys and girls know it's OK to express and discuss their feelings and emotions and to cry when they are sad.

桑德斯说，家长和教师应该确保他们没有强化传统的性别角色。女孩可以倒垃圾，男孩可以洗碗，她说。让男孩和女孩都知道，表达和讨论他们的感受和情绪是可以的，当他们伤心时哭泣也是可以的。