你们曾经是同事。现在你是老板了
你们曾经是同事。现在你是老板了
One day you're work buddies. Then, one of you gets promoted. What happens to the relationship?
你们曾经是同事。然后，你们其中的一个升职了。这段关系会变得怎么样?
When one person gets elevated, it throws off the power balance of a relationship and people have to readjust.
当一个人升职，就会打破一段关系的权力平衡，人们不得不重新调整。
"In the workplace among peers, there is a sense of equality that we are all in this together," said Rebecca Chory, an associate professor at Frostburg State University who studies organizational behavior and workplace relationships. "But when one person moves up, the equality part is no longer there."
弗罗斯特堡州立大学研究组织行为和职场关系的副教授丽贝卡·科里说:“在工作场所，我们都在一起，同事之间有一种平等的感觉。”“但当一个人升职时，平等的部分就不复存在了。”
Talk to your peers
跟你的同事谈谈吧
The relationship is going to change when one person gets promoted — there's no denying that. The key is to recognize the shift and map out a plan to move forward.
当一个人得到提升时，你们的关系就会发生变化——这是不可否认的。关键是要认识到这种转变，并制定出改善的计划。
Have a frank — and likely a little uncomfortable — conversation about what has happened and what happens next.
就已经发生的事情和接下来将要发生的事情进行一次坦率的——可能有点不舒服的——谈话。
"As a new manager, you have to remember that you are no longer peers," said Amy Cooper Hakim, an industrial-organizational psychology practitioner and workplace expert.
行业组织心理学家、职场专家艾米•库珀•哈基姆表示:“作为一名新经理，你必须记住，你们已经不再是同事。”
Be aware that even if one person in the relationship wasn't looking to get promoted, there will likely be some negative feelings, including jealousy.
要知道，即使这段关系中有一个人不想升职，也可能会有一些负面情绪，包括嫉妒。
"The only way those negative emotions can be quelled is by talking them through," said Denise Dudley, a behavioral psychologist.
行为心理学家丹尼斯·达德利说:“平息这些负面情绪的唯一方法就是把它们说出来。”
Lead by example
以身作则
As the new manager, you set the tone of how the new relationship will work with your former peers.
作为新经理，你决定了将如何与前同事共事的新关系。
And don't get fooled into acting tough to gain respect, warned Cooper Hakim.
库柏·哈基姆警告说，不要被愚弄而采取强硬的行动来赢得尊重。
"It doesn't work. Lead by example by being positive and friendly, with a kind tone while still holding people accountable."
“这是行不通的。要以身作则，表现得积极、友好、语气友善，同时仍要让人们负起责任。”
Find a new sounding board
找一个新的倾听者
We all need someone at work to bounce ideas off of. But when you get promoted, it's a good idea to find a new confidant.
我们都需要有人在工作中给我们出主意。但是当你升职的时候，找一个新的知己是个好主意。
"That could mean you cultivate a new relationship with another manager," said Dudley.
“这可能意味着你要和另一位经理建立一种新的关系，”达德利说。
You will likely be privy to more projects and confidential information that shouldn't be discussed.
你可能会知道更多不应该被讨论的项目和机密信息。
"You are now the manager and have certain tasks and obligations to the organization," said Cooper Hakim.
哈基姆说:“你现在是经理，对公司负有一定的任务和义务。
Know that people are watching
要知道大家都在看着你
People are going to assume there will be some favoritism, so try to avoid giving any impression that could be happening.
人们会认为会有偏袒，所以尽量避免给人留下任何可能发生的偏袒某人的印象。
"In general, you are likely not going to hang out in the same way before the promotion, it just gets very sticky," said Cooper Hakim.
库柏·哈基姆说:“一般来说，你不太可能以升职前的方式出去玩，那种情况会变得非常棘手。”
That means cutting back on the private chit-chats you used to have in the kitchen to avoid any perception of partiality.
这意味着减少你过去在厨房里的私人闲聊的时间，以避免任何偏见的感觉。
"No matter what, people will be looking for ways you are practicing favoritism," said Dudley. "You have to ride that through by being so fair and objective that people eventually settle down."
达德利说:“无论如何，人们会寻找你偏袒别人的行为。“你必须做到公正客观，让人们最终安定下来。”
Friends should also note that just because they are close with the now-manager, that doesn't mean they should be asking for any favors or expect special treatment.
朋友们也应该注意到，仅仅因为他们与现任经理关系好，并不意味着他们应该要求任何帮助或期待特殊待遇。
The friendship can end
结束这段友谊
Sometimes, a friendship won't be able to survive one person's move up the org chart -- and that's OK.
有时候，一段友谊不可能在一个人升职后继续存在——这没关系。
"The friendship may fall apart and break up, and in some ways, that solves a lot of the problem," said Chory. "You won't have the tension if you aren't as friendly and disengage."
科里说:“这段友谊可能会破裂，在某种程度上，这解决了很多问题。”“如果你不那么友好，不那么投入，你就不会感到紧张。”
