家有熊孩子的，请看
没人想要宠坏自己的孩子，但有些父母却会为了安抚孩子而满足他们的一切要求。
However according to a family therapist, threatening to punish your child for their bad behaviour, and then failing to follow through by taking action, is exactly what creates a spoiled brat.
一位家庭关系专家认为，孩子出现不良行为的时候加以威胁却没能兑现，恰恰会制造出熊孩子。
Hal Runkel, author of new book Scream Free Parenting, explains that not insisting your child face the consequences of their actions is the single biggest mistake a parent can make when it comes to raising offspring.
《无尖叫式育儿》一书的作者Hal Runkel解释说，父母在育儿时，没能坚持让孩子面对其行为带来的后果，是父母的最大错误。
Hal also believes that not letting your children figure out how the world works for themselves is a mistake.
他还认为不让孩子找出世界磨练他们的方式，也是一个错误。
'What spoils kids is not letting them taste the natural consequences of their mistakes,' he told Business Insider.'When we give them the impression that their choices don't have natural, logical consequences and we rescue them from those - when we say, "Hey, you do that one more time, I'm going to take that thing away," and then we don't take that thing away - that's actually what spoils kids.'
他表示：“宠坏孩子的一种方式，就是不让他们品尝其失误带来的自然后果。当我们给他们留下他们的选择不会带来自然后果的印象时，比如说‘嘿，你再这样做我就把这东西拿走了’，但之后你却并没有拿走他的东西，这就是一种溺爱。”
As an example, he explains that words of warning are just empty threats.
作为例子，他还列举了以下虚张声势的威胁：
Do not tell a child 'if you do that one more time', and threaten them with punishment for repeating a wrongdoing
不要跟孩子说“如果你再这样做”，并以重复某个错误举动来威胁要惩罚他们。
Instead, immediately take action to send a clear message that will deter your child from behaving this way
相反，你应该立即行动起来，给你的孩子传递出清晰的讯息，这样才能让他不再做出类似举动。
Hal says: 'If you're not in control, you cannot be in charge'
Hal表示，如果你不控制自己的脾气，那么你就不能管住他。
According to Hal, if your child hits their sibling with a toy and you threaten to take it away if they hit them 'one more time', your words will go over their head.
如果你们的孩子用某个玩具来打他的兄弟姐妹，而你威胁说如果他们再这样做，他们就会把玩具拿走，那么他们的脑海里就会一直思考你的话。
By doing this, he explains, you're sending a message that they can get away with whatever behaviour they want.
你这样做无疑是在告诉他们，他们能够逃避任何惩罚。
Instead, he argues that you should immediately take the toy they are using to hit their sibling with away from them, which will send a clear message and put them off doing it again.
Hal认为遇到这种情况你们应该立即拿走孩子用来打人的玩具，清楚明白地让他们不要再这样做。
He also believes that it's essential to prepare your children for life without parents.One of the main ways parents can do this, he says, is to leave them to set their own alarm to wake up for school rather than waking them up yourself.
让你的孩子准备好过着没有父母的生活，这一点在Hal看来也很重要。父母们能够做的最主要的一点，就是让孩子自己定闹钟起床上学，而不是由你来叫醒他。
Summarising his views in his book, he concludes: 'Parenting is not about kids, it’s about parents.'If you’re not in control, then you cannot be in charge.'By staying calm and connected with your kids, you begin to operate less out of your deepest fears and more out of your highest principles, revolutionising your relationships in the process.'
Hal在他的书中表示：“育儿与小儿无关，而与父母有关。冷静下来与孩子沟通，这样你才能够稍微摆脱内心深处的恐惧，而更多地从你的原则出发。在这一过程中你们的关系会发生变化。”
