英语美文朗读 第337期 Ignore What Other People Think Of You(上)
给你10个理由，让你不要在乎别人对你的看法。想让别人欣赏和接纳自己，这是人的本性。我们安于现状，因为身边的人也这样。
We tip-toe our way through life by doing things in order to please others. Eventually, our actions, appearances, and lives become molded by how we think other people perceive us. But the truth is, what others think about us can often adversely impact the choices we make and the things we do. This desire to conform to the wishes of others can seriously conflict with our ability to lead independent and rich lives.
为了让别人喜欢我们，我们活得小心翼翼。最终，他人对我们的看法，塑造了我们的行为，我们的外貌，我们的生活。然而，其实，他人对我们的看法，往往会对我们的决定和我们做的事情产生负面影响。既想迎合他人，又想追求独立幸福的生活，这两者本来就是互相矛盾的。
Number 1 - Your life is your business. How many times have you pondered over questions like: How are these clothes going to make me look? What will my colleagues think if I speak out? Are those people talking shit behind my back? If I take this job, what will my friends and family think of me? Look, People are entitled to think whatever they want. Just as you are entitled to think whatever you want! What people think of you cannot change who you are or what you are worth, unless you allow them to. This is your life to live. At the end of the day, you are the only person who needs to approve of your own choices. Well, unless of course if you're married. That's a whole other topic!
第一，你的生活你做主。你是不是经常在想，我穿这个衣服看起来怎样？如果我说出自己的看法，同事们会怎么看我？那些人是不是在背后说我的坏话？如果我选择了这份工作，朋友和家人会怎么看我？别人怎么想，是别人的自由。同理，你怎么想，是你的自由。只要你的立场坚定，那么，别人对你的看法就无法改变你，无法改变你的价值。这是你的生活，毕竟，真正需要认可你的选择的人，只有你自己。但要是你结了婚，那就是另外一回事了。
Number 2 - They don't know what's best for you. It's important to recognize that another person's opinion is often based on what they would do. This alone is the problem. What is best for somebody else, may not be the best for you. Nobody will ever be as invested in your life as you. So only you know what is best for you, and that entails learning from your own choices. The only way you will ever truly learn is through making your own decisions and taking full responsibility for them. This way, if you do fail, at least you can learn from it wholeheartedly, as opposed to blaming somebody else.
第二，别人不知道什么才是对你最好的。很重要的一点是，你要明白，他人的想法，来源于他们的经验，这本身就是个问题，因为对别人而言最好的东西，对你而言不一定就是最好的。你为你的人生付出了最多的努力，所以你才知道什么是对你最好的，这就意味着你要从自己的选择中吸取经验。你成长的唯一途径，就是自己做决定，并为这些决定负责。这样，就算你失败了，起码你能真正从失败中学到经验，而不是去怪罪别人。
Number 3 - People's thoughts change. We all have an internal story that influences how we treat other people and what we think at any given moment. But, our thoughts, ideas and views change on a regular basis! This means, even if somebody does think badly of you at the moment, there is a good chance they will think differently in the near future. So basically, people's thoughts don't mean shit! And that's a pretty darn good reason to stop caring about what other people think!
第三，人们的想法会改变。我们如何对待他人，我们有什么想法，这与我们过往的经历有关。但是，我们的想法经常会改变。这意味着，如果某个人不太喜欢你，很有可能他以后会改变主意。所以，别人的想法根本不重要，你根本不需要在乎别人怎么想。
Number 4 - You will be much happier. You'll find that when you start focusing on your own needs, you'll be spending more time doing things that make you happy. This self-awareness will make you a more rounded individual. It will allow you to better manage your time and give you space to have fun. As a result, you will actually improve the way that people perceive you – and this of course will make you even happier.
第四，你会更加快乐。当你开始专注于自己的需求时，你会发现，你会做更多可以让自己开心的事情，这种自我意识让你变得更成熟，让你合理安排自己的实践，让你能够适当放松娱乐。因此，别人对你的看法也会变得更积极，这会让你更加快乐。
Number 5 - Your relationships will improve. Try putting yourself first, in more situations. This way, in relationships, you will have a much stronger base to explain what you will and won't do. The ability to set boundaries effectively will give you the ability to say no - and mean it. Instead of taking on every request, you'll only do the things that make you happy and this will give you more energy and a better reputation for being reliable. These things will make your relationships with other people much healthier in the long run.
第五，你的人际关系会改善。多尝试把自己放在第一位，这样，在人际关系中，你会有更多主动权，你想做或不想做什么事，都是合理的。划清边界的能力会让你能够拒绝他人，而且说到做到。与其答应别人所有的请求，还不如只做那些能让你开心的事，这样你会得到更多的能量，也会得到别人的称赞，因为他们觉得你很靠谱。从长远来看，这些事情会让你的人际关系变得更健康。
